Your life changes completely when you have children. Things that once seemed so important suddenly seem completely insignificant, and your whole world revolves around your baby. That little bundle of joy takes up the vast majority of your emotional energy, which can leave your romantic relationship feeling a little neglected. Keeping the romance alive is a difficult task for many new parents, but it’s an important aspect of your family life that shouldn’t be overlooked.
Book A Date Night
Making time for yourselves as a couple is crucial to maintaining a strong marriage. This can take a little extra planning once you have a baby. If your parents or in-laws live nearby then they might be happy to take your little one for one evening a week so that you and your partner can head out for a romantic evening alone. If not, start searching for a trustworthy babysitter with good references who can help you out once in a while.
Some parents don’t feel comfortable leaving their baby with anyone else for quite some time- this is perfectly normal! Getting out of the house without your baby can be especially difficult if you’re breastfeeding.
If separating from your baby for the night isn’t possible, consider making your own date night at home. Wait for the baby to settle down to sleep and then cook a delicious meal, light some candles and play some relaxing music. Take the time to enjoy each other’s company again.
Make Romantic Gestures
Sweet romantic gestures shouldn’t be a thing of the past just because you have children now. Take the time to leave your partner little love notes, write sweet nothings for them and stick to the fridge or bring home flowers or a favorite treat after work to show them you still love and care for them. It doesn’t have to be a grand declaration of love, just try to create small moments that will brighten up their day.
Remember To Flirt
Once you’re a parent, your conversations tend to revolve around all things baby related. Don’t forget to flirt with your partner like you used to. Compliment them on what they’re wearing, share a quick kiss when you get a moment and send them flirty text messages while they’re at work. These little gestures help your partner see you as a romantic partner as well as a mother, and will remind you both of the earlier days of your relationship.
If you feel like your marriage really isn’t the same after having children, try not to fall into crisis mode. It’s completely natural for the dynamics of a relationship to change when a new member of the family arrives, and it may take some time before things feel normal again. The newborn stage is exhausting and can take its toll on a marriage, so keep in mind that it is just a phase and it will pass- you will eventually have evenings to yourself again and a baby that sleeps through the night!